In High School I had this one English teacher who had us write in a journal everyday for homework. We had to write three pages a day and show it to her. It could be about anything we wanted just had to be the required length of pages. Seeing the way their Dad had them writing in a journal and paying them for it so they could focus on writing rather than a minimum wage job… reminded me of my teacher. I also liked how the Dad said that a writer is the sum of their experiences… and I have found that to be true. Sometimes we can imagine events that might happen or we can draw from the things we have been through and write about it. Add characters to liven up the telling and change names to protect the innocent or the guilty…

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I really felt like the daughter and I had a lot in common. A good relationship with our Dad’s. Love to read. Cynical about love. I feel like there are two different types of people in the world: realists and hopeless romantics… I used to be what I would call a romantic…looking for love and getting my heart broken over and over again. Now I feel like I am more of realist. I kinda even like her motto…

Avoid love at all costs…that’s my motto.

I have been single for quite awhile now. I have gotten so used to it that I really like it. I can’t really see myself being with someone. I like coming and going when I please…and planning trips with my friends. I see movies, concerts, hockey games, travel to new places, and lots more… I can’t say I don’t miss some things but for the most part I do not miss the drama and the fighting that comes along with a relationship. (Well they have always been very much a part of any relationship I had in the past.) Life is too short to live it unhappy. I have always been scared of lots of things but more scared of not trying at all. So I take chances. Sometimes it pays off. Other times it doesn’t.

So here is where I currently am in my life. My Mom and I don’t talk. She likes being around whatever guy she is dating and doing drugs more than talking to her own daughter. Even before we didn’t really have the greatest relationship. My Dad and I have done nothing but grow closer the past 10 years… he is like my best friend. The end of last year was very difficult for me as I thought I had lost my grandmother. She is like my other best friend. She was very sick for a long time and just wasn’t herself. So I could still talk to her but she didn’t always understand or even realize who I was. Sometimes she thought I was my mom…or other people. Now she is better and I am happy to have her where I can talk to her again…but I don’t feel like I can tell her what is bothering me anymore because of a lot of things mostly I am scared of loosing her. Her husband and my grandfather died this past January. When I am not blogging and spilling out all my feelings in posts… I work a full time job and take two classes a semester at the local college. I lead a busy existence. When it gets to much I try to slow down and remember to enjoy the small moments I spend with friends and family.

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So live for the now…spend as much time as you can with the ones you love…and always be true to yourself.

Until the next time…catch you on the flip side.

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